Solicitors!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wife saw hers today and now her solicitor has told her that she is entitled to 10% of my pension and as my pensions are worth more i will now not get 50% of our cash assets!!!!! I rang my solicitor who told me to keep calm as she will look after me and that my wifes solicitor is not quite correct in what she told my wife. Wife said she does not know what to do. I told her that if she goes ahead with her solicitors advice i will fight it. Plus, i will make a claim on all the money etc that is being left to her in her dad's will (he is still alive guys!) I am MASSIVELY stresses out. Like an elastic band pulled to breaking point.
Only 10%, that's low, most would go for 50% of your pension, but then you would go for 50% of her future inheritance.
Do I take it, Kools, that you and your wife are in agreement on what you BOTH would accept - a straight 50:50 split of your current assets with no further or future demands an the other's estate - and it's only your receptive solicitors who are threatening to mess this up? If so, can you not both write a jointly-signed letter to this effect and send a copy to each solicitor?
Wife is unsure about things even though she said this morning that she will email her solicitor telling her she does not want a stake in my future pension. Got to wait now to see.
This is what happens when you both each have your own solicitor - each solicitor will fight for what they think is in your best interest, instead of looking at the overall picture and what is in both your interests and trying to find a joint solution. Agreeing the financial settlement is the most difficult part of the divorce, the rest is more about letting process run its course. Even with a nominal 50/50 split, it doesn't mean each of your keeps all your own pension necessarily, one may have a higher value pension and wants to keep this so sacrifices part of the cash settlement. Exactly this happened I my case - ex-wifey has a mortgage free house and kept her pension, I also kept all my pension (significantly higher amount) but had far less cash and so now have a big mortgage plus child maintenance costs. Next 5 years or so will be tight but once pension matures and kids leave school I'm laughing. Agreeing both the overall split and the cash/pension/other ratios within that is all part of a negotiation.
And in related news, my Decree Absolute has now come through so I'm young, free and single once more!!! Well not so young (big birthday was Sunday) And not really single And probably not so free either
I think I first broached the topic about 3.5 years ago. Probably had 4 or may be 5 mediation meetings to agree the financial settlement, was a lot of waiting on the other half to do simple stuff.
Well, approx 4 weeks or so before Decree Absolute! Not been on here in ages. Putting house on market soon. Been working part time. Ruddy back not right, elbows hurting, knees too. Pains in chest(anxiety etc) Lol No idea where future going at the mo people. Hope you all ok.