"Electrical Assassination" would be a more apt name, especially with some of the attitudes on there.
You don't wash them, it ruins the flavour as they're mostly water anyway. If fresh just wipe, if old just peel them. Either way, get your missus to do it.
So Jord, in an industrial kitchen with say 20kg of button mush to prep, your gonna wipe every single one ...... really ??
Ever worked in a pro kitchen ?
Things tend to be tight for time always
Wiping 20kg (or more) of mush just ain’t gonna happen
True, you don’t wanna soak them but, in a filled sink, chuck em in, quick agitate and lift out with a spider and drain
As to peeling mushrooms ,,,,,, that hasn't happened since war times
Some mush, say morels, a dry brush is better as they’re rather craggy
Sometimes, and especially with wild mush, there is no option other than a quick dunk and drain as they tend to be ‘enriched’ with soil, sand and bugs
No simple wipe over will fully clean them and who wants a gritty cepe in their risotto ?