Options for cracked kitchen floor

Hi, looking for help with options here. Stripped out old kitchen and lamintate floor to reveal several cracks - rubbish slab really. New kitchen coming in 6 weeks, can't be delayed, wife insists on tiled floor. No time to rip out and replace slab - and it would take too long to dry anyway. Looking for a less than ideal way that i might get away with. oh and limited headroom too!

Thought of levelling out and fix cracks as best I can, layer of DPM then 22mm chipboard glued as a floating floor, then tile on top using flexi adhesive? Any chance that might work? Many thanks